Lessons from My Mum, Neurodiversity, and the Strength of Family

November 28th will always be bittersweet for me and my family, it was today three years ago as my sister and I sat by her side that we said goodbye to mum….

I’m grateful that as my sister and I kept our bedside vigil with mum we found Mornington Green a local legacy garden that was a completely new project at that time.

Mums ashes were infused into a young redbud tree on land that will be protected in perpetuity so it can grow and flourish, it is somewhere we can visit as a family, make physical contact with her tree and be surrounded by life and beauty.



It is somewhere I like to think mum would have gotten great enjoyment painting and it is somewhere she can be at peace and rest. 

She is still providing lessons to those of us still here, as it is in the years since her passing we have learnt so much about the neurodiverse brain and how truly tough she was to look after us so much when no almost one outside of her family understood or accepted her.

With my three children being recognised as being on the ASD and ADHD spectrum, and one with a PDA profile, it gives me insights into the way my own brain works and how my mum who was wonderfully intelligent, creative and loving but so very headstrong and isolated that she struggled so much to work her way through this world and connect with others in it.

I am 47 and this new understanding and acceptance of my own neurological workings and it’s physiological connection is something I am very grateful to have experienced and continue to find new ways to work with.

It helps me understand myself even more and the power of the work I do in the physical sense but importantly it helps both my wife and I raise our children to understand themselves from a young age and know this neurodiversity  not only comes with allowances but beautiful and powerful strengths.

Understand that not all battles can be seen, and people are vastly different in many ways including in “the wiring” of their brains.

It doesn’t make them better or worse it’s just different.

Love your mums as best as you can and learn from their life.